so despite wanting to make the best of my 18th. the day that i was waiting for so long. things took a turn.
lmao the usual right? don’t really know why i was expecting anything different.
a whole mindset i had set for myself went back to SHIT. in a matter of a couple of minutes. i wanted to rip the hair off my head. and flick off anyone who tried to wish me.
like you wouldn’t want to test me.
i kept remembering why i hate my birthday. why i couldn’t deal. and kept questioning who i thought i was that i could possibly even think that i could make it go any different this time around.
so i started feeling sorry for myself. the last couple hours not doing anything sitting there wondering what the point was once again.
but in reality i knew what it was. i just had to be reminded again.
i went on insta to check up on my recent posts like any other. and realized i had a request in my DMs.
and just like that. my day went from utter disappointment and sadness to something so unexpected. a little glimpse of genuine pure honesty.
the littlest things. they make all the difference.
when you feel so alone that there’s really not another person who would get it? you can’t breathe. you’re stuck. so what can you do?
you wonder if any of it is worth it? like let’s be real the thought comes up.
but i’m telling you. and i will keep saying it. it is ALWAYS worth it. even if it doesn’t feel like it. there’s always something. something no matter how small or tiny. THAT. that something. that is what makes it worth it.
i would have never thought. never in a billion years....
like she called herself a FAN GIRL. for me ???? my blog ???? something i created. CRAZY.
you have no idea how much of an impact the smallest things can have on someone. we all think so many things in our head. we see a girl walking down the street and we think about something of hers that we love.
but we just think it. over and over. and we don’t say it. but why not? hearing that one thing could literally MAKE that girl’s day. it could’ve changed everything. you’d never even know.
this girl changed my day in a heartbeat. she made my birthday into something worth remembering.
she made me think…
maybe i have something worth saying after all.